Inside Studio JRy: 2014 Taught me to Forgive and Move On (now 2015 is about growing...)

Happy Chanukah,  Happy Christmas, Happy Boxing Day, Happy New Year to you all!

I have to tell you all that this year was whirlwind of change and accomplishments on another level.  I can't even begin to think about what made this year so special, but it was very transformative.  

I always looks back on blogs posted approximentally a year prior and compare where I was a year before.  I do this TWICE a year.  The first at Rosh Hashanah and then again at the traditional New Year after Christmas Day has passed.

What I find is that all my spiritual tasks and mindsets are reset during Rosh Hashanah as they should be and that I go through a three-and-a-half month transformation during the High Holy Days, secular and Christian holidays that gets me off-course a bit and teaches me more about myself than most lessons studied in text books.

This past three-and-a-half months have taught me about forgiveness and how to be completely bare and open with truth that lies underneath each word, each deed and each person's interaction with me.

I feel like there has been a calm period in my life for once in my life and that I owe most of the credit to myself, really, for shutting up and listening to God and The Universe and telling everyone else to go fly a kite.

I have separated, I have dated, I have been broken, I have fallen in love and STILL maintained a successful business, grown my business and learned to take time for me... FINALLY!!

1. This year was the big separation from Andrew after six years of friendship and many arguments and many intellectual talks that has left me wanting to never speak to him ever again.  He's not a priority.  He is who he is.  I don't ever want to rekindle that connection as friends.  It's okay.  Really. 

2. I dated this year for once in my life when I always relied on never giving anyone any chances and realized that even after giving chances, some people are just unsure of what they want in life.  I can't help those people and after falling in love, I can say that the lesson lies in "moving on".

I'm so glad I took the opportunity to date, really.  I wouldn't have been open to The Mister if I hadn't.

3. I am the king of what it feels like to be broken.  Broken is okay.  Melancholy kind of feels good, but being broken for more than three days and constant despair is a bad look on anyone.  I have learned this by watching my own family members suffer from depression that causes anger and denial.  I don't want to be that person at all unless someone passes away and even then, I have learned there is a dawn to all the darkness.

4. This year I fell in deep down, true, passionate love.  Who knew cynical, judgmental, sarcastic me would ever fall in love?  Well, it happened.  I also learned that if you want to love someone fully you have to FULLY be available to them.  I love him, he loves me,  it's been a beautiful transition and my life has changed... for the better.

5. Business grew RIDICULOUSLY this year!  For once, I was able to give presents I wanted at Christmas, donate to charity, donate to political campaigns and sponsor events without blinking.  Well, maybe I blinked, but I wrote the check and moved on.  Things were very good at the salon, the blog world calmed down a bit as I took time to branch out into comedy performances, podcasts and juggling an active and selective social life on my terms this year.

6. For once, I learned how to take time for me.  Yes, time for ME!  The main struggle in my life has been taking time for ME. Years of writing, touring, doing hair, owning a brand, owning a location, performing and public speaking left me with nearly NO TIME in my twenties, but to drink when I was bored and take part in irritating feuds with peasants.  

I have no time for that.  I have a successful business, live as a successful writer and performer, am sought-after and have learned to dip out of the social scene from time to time because I needed to.  

This year as taught me to value me more and to live by the following philosophy when someone crosses you:

"THEY ARE NOT MY PROBLEM TO HAVE."

Time to move into 2015 with The Mister, a new living arrangement (he's moving in) and focus on growing my Rocktars and Lambs, LTD empire.  

Look out 2015, I'm flexing my creative muscle this year! 

xoxo - j.

Inside Studio JRy: Thinking outside yourself...

Good evening friends,

How are you?

It's about 10:15 pm on a Monday evening as I type this.  Colorado is cold this time of year and not even as chilly as it possibly can or WILL be in the next couple weeks and months.  

Tonight, I was invited to a wine tasting and opted out to work on my third year of my toy drive and filling out Christmas cards.

There's something about this time of year that brings people closer to their sense of selflessness and selfishness.  I can see who is a giver and who is a taker in this world as soon as Black Friday rolls around.  

For me, Christmas was all about being together, cooking and talking growing up.  Presents were, of course, present, but not the focus.

As I got older and technology became more fluent in households, it was clear to see who was just being material and who actually had a connection to their family or something outside of themselves as they approached that glorious 25th day in December.  

For me, as I've gotten older, I've learned to pull-back on my gift-giving and give back to my community.  I have a philosophy: take care of yourself and THEN help take care of others.  Also, when you are blessed immensely, you should share what you have.

Last year, my toy drive provided over 200 homes with gifts for children.  I couldn't believe the numbers.  I would have been happy if even three kids had toys, ya know?

We had so many toys come in, I had enough to donate to two different non-profit organizations.  It was remarkable.

This year is also different because I have someone special to spend the holidays with.  I pinch myself sometimes because I can't believe that things are falling into place.  The other thing I have noticed is that as soon as I blink my eyes, things can change and they DO!

This past week was Thanksgiving and I have to tell you, it was one of the most low-key holidays I've ever had.  It was also very stressful as I brought The Mister home for the holidays.  It was the first time either my sister or I had brought a significant other to the family gathering. 

It felt right, friends.  I felt absolutely perfect.

As I reflect back on this last week and taking time away from the salon and look back at the past month of taking time away from the social scene and deciding to stay in a little more and not drink as much as not worry about people that aren't worrying about me as much: I have to tell you, things are starting to balance out.  

Crazy how life evens itself out, ya know?

Now... time to work on getting some toys for those kids...

-j